Kari and Kristin are sound asleep.
This morning, as I was thinking about what to write about, I came across this picture of my baby girls when we were living on 8th Street in Eugene. Kari was 5 and Kristin was 4 when this was taken. They were so innocent, and they trusted me.
The memories of the year that we lived there are not really very good. Too much drama, too many people in and out of our lives, and two of our dogs died while we were living in that house.
Looking at my little girls in that photo kind of makes me sad. I wish that I had the peace and stability back then that I have now. My sweeties weathered the storms and grew up to be strong, beautiful, successful women who have their heads on straight, so all is well that ends well, I guess. I am so happy that had a really good dad behind them.
Back then, I was doing things my own way, and trying to make it all work, but it really could have been better for everybody if I had made better relationship choices. It wasn't until my little Nigel was around two, that I finally surrendered to God and let him have a try at running my life. (I had already been working as a church secretary for a year and a half by that time.) I sat down on the kitchen floor in tears and said, "Fine, God, you do it!" So, he did.
Things got better after that, but I still ended up having to clear certain people from my life before I was on the right path for me. It is very hard living with people who constantly create drama and chaos. I know that there are readers out there who are going through a lot of things right now. I just want to give you hope. I have not always been married to my best friend husband, getting new trucks, traveling around taking pictures, and having time to work on a blog. Believe me. Things can change for the better.
I am so grateful that God has guided me to making better choices. I invested in myself by leaving a super unhealthy relationship and returning to school to get my degree. I moved a couple hours away to a new town to finish school, and then ended up meeting Cary five years later. I don't believe any of that was an accident. So, anyway, here is one of my favorite Bible passages that has always given me hope, and I hope that it will do the same for you:
"I waited patiently for God to help me; then he listened and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out from the bog and the mire, and set my feet on a hard, firm path, and steadied me as I walked along. He has given me a new song to sing, of praises to our God. Now many will hear of the glorious things he did for me, and stand in awe before the Lord, and put their trust in him. Many blessings are given to those who trust in the Lord and have no confidence in those who are proud or who trust in idols."
PSALM 40 1-4, The Living Bible
"Don't look at other people's outsides
and compare them to your insides."
and compare them to your insides."
